Redefining Stress
If you read the last article, we focused on the 3S of stress: Stressors, Signs and Signals. Now it’s to explore our current relationship to stress. So what are your thoughts, is stress a good thing or a bad thing?
Our relationship to stress can influence the role we have in dealing with the onslaught of stressors we experience on a day to day basis.
3 default roles around stress
The Stress Sloth - These tend to be those who never appear to be bothered and stressed out. Or at least they try to make others believe it anyway. It can be a combination of not noticing any signs nor expressing any signals. It can also be a symptom of being overly sheltered. The risk here is that there’s not enough stress to get moving, therefore the response can be slow or less effective. We can also refer this as a state of no to low stress.
The Stress Avoider - Many people are in the camp of stress is bad and as a result believe we should avoid it. We notice two extremes, either people are stuck and not moving as they are avoiding the stressor or they are over-experiencing it, leading to inefficient and sometimes damaging ways of dealing with the stressor. We sometimes refer to this as the "fight, flight or freeze” response or a state of distress
The Stress Seeker - Stress seekers tend to view stress as neither a good or bad thing. As a result, they are constantly seeking the balance between the Sloth and the Avoider. As a result of being able to regulate their level of stress to meet the expectations of the situation and move forward. People who “be-friend” their stress tend to be in a state of eustress or even as Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi describes a sate of flow.
Redefining our relationship to Stress
So stress has often been defined as a bad thing as it leads to harm to our health and quality of life. Doctors and experts for the longest time would focus mostly on how do we get rid of it. However, what if the issue is not so much stress but our relationship to stress. I do agree that prolonged stress adds un-necessary burden but I also agree that having no stress is not helpful to get us moving either. What if we could re-define stress in a way that is less loaded and more objective. So finally, my definition is this. Stress is a reaction to change. It’s neither good or bad but helps to bring attention to a change, so we can respond effectively to the situation or change. In a even simpler way, stress is energy.
